Category Archives: Stories

Zero to My Own Hero – The Evolution of Me

Over time I’ve changed, grown taller and wiser. My physical appearance, ways of thinking, and self-wort have all teetered back and forth, from one extreme to the other. Every experience is an opportunity for growth, if we are open, even the most difficult situations have the power to teach us something

A friend once said to me that she remembered that I “wasn’t good at anything” when we were kids. This week I talk about what’s changed over the years. Life hasn’t always been easy but I make the most of things.

Most importantly, I’ve gained more self-confidence through growing a better understanding of myself.

My Friend Coffee

I love coffee, we’ve grown old together. Our relationship is a long one. I started drinking coffee at the age of twelve but my first taste was much earlier.

At my great grandmother’s house, I toddled around with a plastic cup of milk. From the kitchen, I heard a happy voice, “Coffee’s ready! Come and get it!” I moved with the adults into the kitchen, tiny yellow cup in hand, waiting to get my coffee.

When it was my turn the adults hesitated, but after my firm insistence, a few drops of coffee were poured into my milk cup. “She’s not going to like it” a voice from above me boomed. “I didn’t put enough in there for her to taste anything” another whispered.

The first voice was right. My face puckered as the milk hit my taste buds. Repulsed by the bitterness, I passed my tainted cup up into the crowd of adults and walked away.

In the mid-nineties, coffee came back into my life in the form of the Starbucks blended Frappuccino. To a twelve-year-old, this sweet concoction was basically a coffee milk shake. You could get them with extra toppings and all the sugar hid the bitterness of the coffee.

Once again, coffee was my good friend when I entered the workforce. Sixty plus hour weeks with spit shifts and long days were saved by caffeine. I poured coffee into me like fuel when I didn’t have time to eat. Eventually, I was up to drinking an entire pot of coffee on my own in an 8 hour work day. I loved coffee, however, these habits were completely unhealthy.

Coffee had been a gateway for sugar consumption when I was younger. Now that I’m on the keto diet, sugar is out of the picture, I take my coffee with heavy cream, MCT coconut oil, and a bit of stevia. I like my home made coffee better what I can order at a shop.

Over the years I’ve found a happy balance, mostly because I can no longer handle as much caffeine as I used to. I even cut coffee off completely for a few months when I started the keto diet.

Paying close attention to my body has helped me to learn what’s best for me. Most mornings I have one “real cup of coffee” – a small mug with caffeinated coffee. If I want coffee after 11 am, I go for “the fake stuff” – decaffeinated.

Coffee is still my friend we just realized we were spending a little too much time together.

 

 

NeuroRebel – Float Away Mind – Fiction Based on Reality

The Texas heat is especially unforgiving in August. A dark-haired woman sits in her car, flipping a key chain between her fingers, as she eagerly waits for the next green light. She sits, lost in the sensation of the smooth jingling keys, momentarily unaware of the world around her.

In an instant, the woman is jolted back to reality by an unsettling, noise.

A small child is running at full speed up the sidewalk towards the elementary school. Heart racing, it takes Kat a moment to pair the sound, a loud high pitched screech, with the noise maker.

Finally, the light turns green and Kat manages inch up two whole car lengths. She reaches up and adjusts here rear-view mirror. “That happy kid”, she laughs to herself “I was never that happy when I went to that school.”

Suddenly Kat found herself reliving a memory. First person video of a familiar classroom began to roll in her head. Vivid and colorful memories, with infinite looping playback.

Kat found herself toe to toe with an old nemesis, her first-grade teacher.

This new teacher was a force to be reckoned with. Mrs. B. demanded blind obedience from her students. She was a “my way or the highway” kind of teacher. Students who questioned her were quickly placed on her “shit list”.

The traffic light turned green.

HONK! HONK!

Kat quickly re-entered reality, pressing into the accelerator with enough force to make up for the distance she lost while daydreaming at the light.

“Mind on the road!” Kat tells herself, as she hits play on the touch screen car stereo. “No thinking. No distractions!”

Twenty perfect piano notes dance, tickle the car speakers as Mad World by Gary Jules takes over the car.

Once again Kat’s mind had floated away.  Gone someplace else, lost in a music video created by her mind. “Teacher tell me what’s my lesson? Looked right through me. . . . looked right through me.”

“Shit!” Red light. Kat slams on the breaks, managing to stop the beat up Nissan Sentra just in time. “Fuck!”

“Mindfulness. Right now. Right now. Right now” she muttered under her breath, as she spun the stereo dial until it clicked into the mute position.

 

 

 

 

 

The Stories We Tell – The Legacies We Leave Behind

Whether you know it or not you are writing a book.

We all tell stories; if not in the text and in words than we tell them with our actions. The things we do in life are the legacies that we leave behind. Choices we make become our influence on the world even after we’re gone (especially now in the digital age where people argue freely online).

It is easy to be careless but it is essential that we exercise caution over our actions. The person you choose to be in life is a book you write. What will be written on the pages of your life?

What inheritance will you leave the earth? Will you leave it better than you found it? Will you make your story a gift to the world – or will you be a curse? How do your actions impact those around you and those you never see?

When you toss the soda can rings in the ocean you may never see the animal tangled as a result. You may not see the agony of your dog on the days you spend too many hours at work. Often our actions have consequences that we are completely unaware of.

Sometimes we are fortunate enough to experience our bad decisions first hand. These times we are lucky because we have the opportunity to learn from our mistakes – if we so choose to.

Life is full of choices. Good one’s bad ones. Unfortunately, it is easier for people to remember your bad choices over the good ones.

Those of us who would rather be remembered for our good deeds over the bad ones have our work cut out for us. We must work extra hard to be mindful of our actions so that we can more efficiently manage our time.

Cleaning up our mistakes is much more work than avoiding them, to begin with – learning lessons, working not to repeat our failures, trying our best to do as little harm as possible, but there can be no balance unless you give something positive back.

I am aware that driving my car to work is most likely doing harm to bugs and other tiny creatures along the way. However, living somewhere with little to no public transportation, it would be in practical for me to walk.

Some harm is unavoidable. Do not turn away from these unfortunate truths or avert your eyes from those who are suffering. These things are the realities of the world and turning a blind eye is the least helpful thing you could do.

When you write your tale put something worthwhile in your publication. Goodness knows there’s enough garbage in the world these days.