There’s a lot of confusion in online Autism spaces over the differences between “Autism” and co-occurring conditions and disabilities that are common in Autistic People (that are separate from, or in addition to, a person’s Autistic brain).
There is often a gap in understanding of those caring for Autistic People who have additional complex disabilities, who believe those conditions are essential core parts of their loved one’s Autism (because these disabilities can heavily influence an Autistic Person’s experience as well as the caregiver’s life).
This gap in understanding results in Autistics with fewer (or less outwardly noticeable) co-occurring conditions being frequently berated and abused online by parents and caretakers who insert themselves into our comments sections and profiles to tell us we’re “not autistic” because, to these parents (who only know Autistic People like their own child), Autism is something very different (and specific).
To many of these parents, Autism IS all of the co-occurring disabilities their child experiences.
Some of these parents will see an Autistic adult happy and thriving in a way they’ve been told their child never will, and it fills them with rage, especially if, to them, Autism is only something they know to cause pain and sorrow.
In their eyes, Autistic People who don’t struggle the same way their loved one struggles must not really be Autistic (or are “too high functioning to know what real Autism is“-whatever that means).
We are accused of “watering down Autism” simply by sharing our authentic lives on the part of the spectrum that was ignored for many years – because much of the world still thinks Autism is an Autistic Person who has a long list of complex-co-occurring conditions, in addition to Autism.
Even now, when I Google or search the word Autism on Facebook, I find resources about Autistic children with profound struggles and advertisements for ABA.
Unless I add more keywords, it is challenging to fund resources for Autistic adults like me, especially those identified late in life (as I was).
Shining light on one part of the spectrum doesn’t take away from the Autism conversation; it adds to it – so why are these caregivers so upset about sharing space with Autistics whose experiences are unlike the experiences of their loved ones?
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