There are a lot of reasons someone might decide they want to change their name.

I’ve recently changed my name and if you only follow me on YouTube and you’re not connected with me on Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter, this might be new information to you because I preschedule these videos in advance and a lot of these have been set up since April or March before I announced my name change.

I’m Lyric, and we’re going to dive in and talk about why I changed my name and why some other people may decide that their birth name is not what’s best for them.

So, if you want to know more, please stay tuned.

Transcript:

There are a lot of reasons someone might decide they want to change their name.

I’ve recently changed my name and if you only follow me on YouTube and you’re not connected with me on Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter, this might be new information to you because I preschedule these videos in advance and a lot of these have been set up since April or March before I announced my name change.

I’m Lyric, and we’re going to dive in and talk about why I changed my name and why some other people may decide that their natural (NOT SURE WHY I SAID NATURAL THAT MAKES NO SENSE) birth name is not what’s best for them. So, if you want to know more, please stay tuned.

In the spring of 1987, a small child was brought into the world, assigned female, and named Christa Angelica Holmans.

This small child, given this assignment and name, that has never quite felt fitting, is me.

There are many reasons someone might choose to give up a birth name and yes, birth names are gifts that our parents do give us, but, as with any gift. They are not gifts that we are obligated to keep.

The fantastic thing about being an adult is you can do what you want and part of that is if you, so like, you can change and choose your own name.

The first am I changed my name, I didn’t do so legally, but I was in middle school and I told everyone to call me Kat.

I spelled it Kat, but I meant cat like the animal.

Meow.. Meow.

I’ve really not liked Christa for a long time and now, as an adult, I have the means to legally changed my name and am going through that process. The new name that I have picked is Lyric and my new middle name will be Lark. That’s because I get to pick a name that actually suits and matches me as a person.

People that know me have said that this is a really suiting name because Lyric – I am always singing. Music is always in my head. Music is always in my life. Music is my favorite stim, as an Autistic person. Music is everything to me and I also am someone who has a musical background and spent many years in choir and had formal Music training in high school, before I had some vocal scarring and my voice changed and all of that.

Lyric -because of my love for music, the fact I go around singing everything and turn everything into song and Lark, because birds are also always singing and a few other reasons. 

Lyric Lark, instead of Christa Angelica.

Do you feel like that is more suiting for me as a human, those of you who’ve been following for a while, or if you’re new, first impressions, do you think Lyric Lark is better than Christa Angelica for me?

Christa Angelica, I’ve never liked this name.

I’ve always strongly hated  and hid my middle name because, when I was growing up, Rug Rats was really big, and Angelica was not someone I wanted to be compared to.

My first name, Christa, one that was much harder to escape because it was the first thing that many people would hear when they met me, was something that has required more work to get away from.

My dislike for the name, Christa goes much further than the frustrations of never being able to find your name on any souvenir and the souvenir shop.

The name Christa, my mother said was  Christa, for Christ and Angelica for angel, and my name meant ,Christ’s angel.

I don’t think my mother could possibly have understood how much, this would not be something that brought me comfort as a young Queer person growing up in central Texas churches, that were often very unfriendly to Queer people.

While my mother, and other members of my family found comfort in the church, when I was growing up, I found the church to be a very unsafe place. It was not a place of refuge for me. It was a place of persecution.

In addition, though, my mom said I was named Christ’s Angel, Christa Angelica, my biological father, whom I know very little of, was also named Chris. So the symbolism that my mother had intended with my name was not helpful to me.

In addition, Christa Angelica was a name that felt so soft and feminine, something that I have never felt myself to be.

This soft and feminine name has always felt like an extreme mismatch for me, who I am, and my personality. It has never felt like my name. It is a name I was given, much like the assignment of woman, female that I was assumed would be mine when I was a very small child.

It’s interesting how we make all of these assumptions about children, giving them names when they are born, before we can possibly know who they are, their personalities or who they will be, or if these names can possibly suit them as they grow.

I have not grown into be the person that was possibly imagined of me, but I am lucky that I believe my family is accepting me for the person that I have and am becoming.

My grandmother recently told me that she cannot wait to reintroduce me to everyone as Lyric and we have a small family gathering, because people are finally starting to get vaccinated around here, coming up this weekend and she will be introducing me to people with my new name.

I’m really lucky to have this much support, because unfortunately, there are people who go through this process who do not have support.

In fact, when I shared online that I was changing my name, there were even some comments saying that doing so was disrespectful to my parents.

My mother doesn’t seem to have a problem with this, so I don’t know why some stranger on the internet should say that this is disrespectful to my mother, because my mother has not told me she has any problem. She just said, she’s going to have to get used to it and I’m okay with that. It’s it’s new.

Everyone’s got to get used to something new.

New is change and change, I know from personal experience, is and can be difficult for people.

As my loved ones, and family members get used to this change I, personally, am going to have patience with them. As long as they’re trying, that’s what matters to me.

If somebody slips up and they genuinely did not mean to, and they have made a mistake and they want to do better and they’re not trying to be hurtful. I’m not going to hold that against them.

What I have noticed since coming out with an name change and letting people know that I would rather not be referred to with feminine pronouns, is that the people who have known you the longest are going to be the ones that, often, will have the hardest time breaking the habits, unless they are very immersed in Queer culture and the Queer community, and are just really used to pronouns and all of that stuff.   Even then,  person to person, because your individual relationship with a person can have just different habits with that person, it can take some time and adjustments, but intent really does matter.

If people are trying, that is what matters to me is that people are really doing their best and are not getting it wrong on purpose or to be hurtful.  That’s a very different thing. If someone is intentionally being an a-hole.

That’s different than I’m trying, I’m learning something new. I’ve got to build a new habit.

I appreciate you working and doing the effort and trying hard to build a new habit because I appreciate and understand that building new habits require work and effort.  Thank you for working to build new habits and learn and grow with me as I grow as a person.

Quite common for trans and non-binary people to change their name and I have shared with you the reasons I am choosing to change my name. However, there are plenty of other reasons that people may want to change their name and a lot of those are going to often be very personal.

Maybe the name was a gift from a parent, but that parent was not a parent that that person has fond or positive memories of. The name could be associated with very traumatic childhood events. Maybe the name brings up instant visceral knee-jerk feelings of negative emotions boiling up every time the person hears it.

You can’t possibly know what that name can be associated with in someone’s mind if you weren’t there with them as they grew up.

If people are changing their names, or if someone comes to you and says, please don’t call me by that name, call me by this other name,  just go with it. Don’t require them to give you legal proof to call them a different name.

This legal process I’m going to go through to change my name is going to take a while. I’ve got to do a background check. I’ve got to get my fingers printed. I’ve got to pay a fee. I’m going to do the legal stuff on my own, but if I wasn’t able to do that, I would have to hire a lawyer. I’ve got to go swear in open court about my name change.

It is a whole process and that’s just to get the change approved. That’s not even going and changing my ID and my social security cards and all of the legal documents. I feel like I’m going to be working on this name change for the next few months. I could be wrong. Maybe it won’t take as long as I think it will.

Uh, it maybe it’ll be quick. Maybe the judge will be fantastic. I don’t know, I’m in Texas. Pray for me. Y’all if you’re praying people. I’m not really a praying person, but you know what I mean?

Thank you all hanging out with me again this week. I am so grateful that you are here. Remember if you have video questions, suggestions, or topic ideas to drop those in the comments below. I do try to talk about things you’re interested in and that you want to learn about.

Thank you so much to the Patreon subscribers. You’re seeing this video probably at the end of April while the public release for this video is going to be closer to the end of May. Getting that video early is just a very small way I can say thank you for subscribing on YouTube, Facebook or Patrion – give that little extra to help support this blog so that I can continue to put out regular high quality content.

I put out new videos each and every Wednesday, so I hope to see you all next week.

We’ll talk to you again soon. Bye humans! .

Help me get the word out!!! – If you like what I do, and would like more, please consider subscribing on Patreon. This blog is made possible by support from readers like YOU!  (Sharing my content is also, equally helpful!)

With gratitude, Lyric