Tag: Relationships

Masking / Passing, Relationships / Bullies / Friendships, Videos1 Comment

Autism & Developing Authentic Relationships – My Autistic Experience

Lyric Holmans

I’m covering a reader question: “wondering if you could cover the topic of connecting with other people, and building friendships while on the spectrum.”

Something else that’s incredibly important, for me, as an Autistic Person, and my relationships with other people, is:

I need people in my life to be willing to accept me for the whole person, my strengths, my weaknesses, all of my identities, my Autistic traits, my me being a Queer Person. All of these things have to be okay.

The people in my life can’t be people who need for me to put parts of myself away, when I’m around them.
Continue reading Autism & Developing Authentic Relationships – My Autistic Experience

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Autism & Learning to Recognize Autistic Meltdowns Before It’s Too Late

Lyric Holmans

Sometimes when I am unable to get away from other people, or the situation that I am in, or event that has triggered my meltdown, then I will go from flee to fight, and have a meltdown, where I may become air quotes, “combative”, “aggressive”, “defensive” -because I feel as if I am in danger, and cannot flee and get away from the danger, so then it switches to “defend myself and fight”. Continue reading Autism & Learning to Recognize Autistic Meltdowns Before It’s Too Late

Autistic Interests, Coworkers, Family, Masking / Passing, Videos, Vlogs1 Comment

Late NeuroDivergent Diagnosis – Diagnosed Autistic at 29 – Reading my Autism Diagnostic Report

Lyric Holmans

It was August 23rd, 2016, when I went in for the first part of my autism assessment, an in-person interview with myself and the person who would be reviewing my childhood history and medical records.

By the end of August, all of the interviews would be concluded, and by early September 2016, at the age of 29, I would be diagnosed Autistic.

At that point in my life, being almost 30 and having such a bombshell of a piece of information dropped upon me, I skimmed a 13 page (actually 14 page) diagnostic report, but was very overwhelmed, and couldn’t process the report in front of me. In fact, I threw the report into a paper shredder, and destroyed the report.

However, recently, more than five years later, I’m feeling more ready to face the information that was in front of me all of those years ago. Continue reading Late NeuroDivergent Diagnosis – Diagnosed Autistic at 29 – Reading my Autism Diagnostic Report

Children & Families, Family, Masking / Passing, Videos1 Comment

Things I Got in Trouble for Growing up as an Undiagnosed Autistic ADHDer

Lyric Holmans

I didn’t find out I was Autistic until I was 29, and my ADHD wasn’t diagnosed until several years later, however, autism and ADHD are both lifelong neurodevelopmental differences.
This means I was Autistic and ADHD my entire life, growing up, as a child, and I will be Autistic ADHD, my brain will be the same, the day I die.
There were obvious manifestations of my brain difference as a child growing up, many of which were labeled as “behavioral problems” and dismissed, or I was constantly scolded for acting in a very Autistic ADHD way.
Continue reading Things I Got in Trouble for Growing up as an Undiagnosed Autistic ADHDer

Coworkers, Family, Masking / Passing, Relationships / Bullies / Friendships, Videos3 Comments

I’m Autistic and this is Why I Find People Overwhelming

Lyric Holmans

Before I learned I was Autistic, I didn’t look for information in people’s faces, or their body language, to see how they were feeling or even to see if they were interested in things I was saying. It just never really occurred to me that there was information there and at 29, I started to study what facial expressions and body language means.

That meant I was having really difficult interactions with other people, because I wouldn’t realize I was annoying them, or I wouldn’t read the situation well. Continue reading I’m Autistic and this is Why I Find People Overwhelming

Children & Families, Coworkers, Family, Masking / Passing, Relationships / Bullies / Friendships, Videos1 Comment

Setting and Maintaining Boundaries when You are Autistic or Neurodivergent

Lyric Holmans

When I first discovered I was Autistic at the age of 29, it was because I was going through Autistic burnout and that’s because I was in a perpetual state of burning myself out because I didn’t know I was Autistic and I didn’t know how to establish healthy boundaries with the neuro-typical people around me that kept insisting I didn’t really need the things I was saying I needed. Continue reading Setting and Maintaining Boundaries when You are Autistic or Neurodivergent