Category: Neurodiversity

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I Was Named in a Manosphere Hit Piece for “Gentrifying Autism”. The “Gentrification of Autism” Is a Myth. The Policing Is Real.

Lyric Holmans

Asking Neurodivergent People: Have you ever been accused of “faking” your Neurodivergence?

This summer, I was named in a blog post by some random manosphere dude (along with several others) as someone who, in their opinion, has been “responsible for the gentrification of Autism, ADHD, and other disabilities,” and, according to this man, we are “pretending to be Neurodivergent for clout” and as a way to “excuse our own mediocrity,” and “anti-social,” and other so-called “bad behaviors” that this stranger claims to see in us.

When it happened, one month ago today, I mostly ignored it, but I am deciding to speak up now, because recently, I’ve seen multiple similar pieces dragging other Autistic and ADHD adults using very similar language popping up all over the internet… and I am noticing some patterns. Continue reading I Was Named in a Manosphere Hit Piece for “Gentrifying Autism”. The “Gentrification of Autism” Is a Myth. The Policing Is Real.

Children & Families, Coworkers, Dyspraxia, Masking / Passing, Relationships / Bullies / Friendships, Substack
Image of a jail cell with two bunkbeds inside.

If School Felt Like a Prison, You Might Be Neurodivergent – The Hidden Curriculum That Punishes Neurodivergent Kids

Lyric Holmans

Growing up, school was one of the worst experiences of my life, for many reasons.
Unfortunately, though some Neurodivergent young people love and enjoy their school years, for many of us who are Neurodivergent, school can be very difficult because it is often the first system we’re pushed into that is not designed in a way that supports our needs (pressuring us to conform to neuro-normative ideals and norms that may be out of reach for us, especially if we don’t have our basic needs met).

That’s why struggling in school, for many of us, can be one of the first signs that we might be Neurodivergent. Continue reading If School Felt Like a Prison, You Might Be Neurodivergent – The Hidden Curriculum That Punishes Neurodivergent Kids

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A white mask on a white background. A pale hand with red fingernails makes its way up to the mask, placing the pointer finger over the mask’s lips, as if to say “shhh”.

Fawning + Autistic Masking: When Autistic Masking Becomes Fawning and Why We Hide Ourselves Despite the Cost

Lyric Holmans

Autistic masking (also known as camouflaging) is when an Autistic person consciously or subconsciously masks their Autistic traits to blend in with non-autistic people. When we do this, it is not to be manipulative or deceptive. It is a survival skill and can also be tied to trauma responses (such as fawning). More on fawning in a moment. Continue reading Fawning + Autistic Masking: When Autistic Masking Becomes Fawning and Why We Hide Ourselves Despite the Cost

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A photo of 5 books on a rainbow background: Workplace Neurodiversity Diversity Rising by Lyric Rivera (a purple book with a pink brain on the cover), Autism Identity and Me: A Parent and Professional Guide Rebecca Duffus with Lyric Rivera (a grey book with a circle of rainbow dots around it), Autism Identity and me, a Practical Workbook to Empower Autistic Children and Young People Age 10+ (A purple book with a rainbow of circles around it), Neurodivergent Rebel’s The Weight of Normal by Lyric Rivera (a teal book with a pink brain on the cover), and one that is COMING SOON - Autism Identity and Me: A Practical Workbook to Empower Autistic Adults by Rebecca Duffus and Lyric Rivera (a purple book with a rainbow lotus flower on the cover).

It’s Not a Tantrum: What Actually Happens During an Autistic Meltdown

Lyric Holmans

Question for my Autistic readers: Do you have, or have you ever had, a meltdown? If so, how would you describe them to other people? Also, what would you like people to know about them?

What IS an Autistic meltdown?

When an Autistic person has a meltdown, it is an involuntary nervous system response to compounding environmental or internal stressors. Continue reading It’s Not a Tantrum: What Actually Happens During an Autistic Meltdown

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A black and white photo of two disabled children in strait jackets, chained to a radiator in a room with dirty walls and floors.

Autism, ADHD, and Autonomy – The One Thing Neurodivergent and Disabled People Need Most (That Keeps Getting Taken Away)

Lyric Holmans

Autonomy isn’t about doing everything alone. It’s about choosing who sits beside us. For NeuroDivergent and disabled people, that choice is often taken away, sometimes with the best intentions. Here’s what happens when we aren’t allowed to steer our own lives. Continue reading Autism, ADHD, and Autonomy – The One Thing Neurodivergent and Disabled People Need Most (That Keeps Getting Taken Away)

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Photo of Lyric from several years ago, when they had short green hair, posing in front of a vibrant rainbow wing mural outdoors. They’re wearing purple ankle boots, dark blue jeans, a grey tank-top with the word ‘Autistic’ on it in a rainbow font, and a black leather jacket, while standing in a power pose.

Autistic Burnout – The ‘Mystery Illness’ That Doctors Missed for 30 Years (And Why a Vacation Won’t Fix It)

Lyric Holmans

Autistic burnout is a topic that I know intimately, for multiple reasons.

As an Autistic person who was not identified as such for most of my life, due to not knowing about my Autistic mind and the accompanying needs associated with my Autistic brain and nervous system, I spent most of my life cycling in and out of Autistic burnout.

It was also Autistic burnout that, eventually, led to me finally being diagnosed as Autistic a few months before my 30th birthday.

Being burned out was, for many years, my normal. Continue reading Autistic Burnout – The ‘Mystery Illness’ That Doctors Missed for 30 Years (And Why a Vacation Won’t Fix It)

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A young Lyric, with their dog Ripley, looking very miserable in their Easter dress.

You Weren’t the Problem. The System Was. Here’s How I Know.

Lyric Holmans

For most of my life, I believed, falsely, that I was inherently flawed and unworthy of compassion, kindness, and respect (from other people and from myself).

It’s hard to say exactly when, where, and why this feeling of inadequacy started, because my memory is a bit wonky, and multiple events played into it. However, there are a few events in particular that do stand out to me. Continue reading You Weren’t the Problem. The System Was. Here’s How I Know.

Masking / Passing, SubstackLeave a comment
This is fine dog on fire meme - A 2 panel comic meme of a dog sits at a table casually sipping coffee while the room around them is burning. The first panel says "Autistic & other sensory sensitive people acting like everything is fine when they're actively in sensory overload", and the second panel the dog says "This is fine" while the caption reads "but it wasn't fine at all."

The Sensory Hell No One Told Me About (And How It Almost Killed Me)

Lyric Holmans

I had nearly 30 years of frequent and totally preventable migraines that left me sick in bed (multiple times a month and sometimes multiple days a week), or forcing myself to attend school and work (with disorientation so intense it was dangerous for me to be out on the road driving, but because I had to work to get paid I forced myself to drive anyway just like I’d been forced to go to school growing up in a similar state). Continue reading The Sensory Hell No One Told Me About (And How It Almost Killed Me)

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Lyric Rivera - NeuroDivergent Rebel - refusing assimilation into neurotypical society

The Rage That Saved Me & The Pain Before the Pride: What Success Looks Like When You’re Late-Diagnosed – A Late Identified AuDHD (Autistic and ADHD) Story

Lyric Holmans

There is a lot of talk in Neurodivergent spaces about how much relief late-identified Neurodivergent people find when they finally learn the truth about themselves. However, there’s not as much discussion on the pain and grief late identification can bring.

Don’t get me wrong, being diagnosed Autistic (and then later ADHD) did bring me relief and was a critical turning point in my life. Yet, early on, as I learned to sit with that new information, joy and relief were not my only (or even primary) emotions.

People who join me in this chapter of my life, when I am confident, happy, and proud of my multiply-Neurodivergent identity, might falsely think I’ve always been this way, or that getting here was easy. However, they’re missing out on the first thirty-eight chapters of my life’s story, and nothing could be further from the truth.
Continue reading The Rage That Saved Me & The Pain Before the Pride: What Success Looks Like When You’re Late-Diagnosed – A Late Identified AuDHD (Autistic and ADHD) Story